Trials and the Unknowns

We all know what it’s like to go through seasons of trials and seasons of the unknowns. They’re never easy but the Bible PROMISES that we will have them. (John 16:33) Recently, our family and myself have been through a couple of seasons of unknowns.

Firstly, we’ve known for almost a year now that we have move from our rental property by the beginning of this summer. A few things (ok a lot of things) have changed for us over the past two years just like they have for everyone else. So, we weren’t exactly sure what God was/is doing. Was/is He calling us to move back south? How will we pull this off with 4 kids and all the animals? (Future post on the animals maybe?) Everything has changed. God, open the doors! Currently, we see doors being opened in our new church. We’ve been able to connect with others and have grown so much in our walks over the past 6 months or so and we feel Him working. As many know though, now is NOT the time to be buying a house. There’s not a whole lot on the market and what is out there, the market is HIGH! This is a HUGE unknown for us but we continue to pray and ask God to open the doors and show us where He needs us. Even if we have to give up some of the things (animals) we’ve been blessed with over the past 6 years. We feel a peace about this though. Oddly, enough. We know He will show us. There are still times where one of us (more so me than Delmar) have a moment of questioning and wanting an answer desperately! Being a homemaker it’s not easy not knowing where the majority of your time will be spent taking care of your family, serving them and others, and enjoying community will happen in the next, oh, 3-4 months! We have been beyond blessed with where we live! We have been able to make this rental property our home and a dream come true for me. So, in this season of trial, unknown, and having faith in God’s timing I’ve realized how much I’ve taken our farm/ranch/homestead (whatever you want to call it, we call it home) for granted. I have always wanted this life style. The animals mainly. I even have a journal page from when I was maybe 9 or 10 talking about it, that I’ve held onto to remind me of this dream. But, I haven’t gone out and enjoyed them as much as I should have. I have stayed too busy with keeping up with inside of the house to go out an enjoy what God has blessed us with! Good ‘ole Mary vs Martha scenario right? This is something I’m changing or trying to at least. God has blessed us with these animals! I should appreciate them more! Plus, it brings my heart joy to go out to our pigs, start rubbing their ears, only to have them lay down and roll over for their bellies to be rubbed! Spoiled much? That’s a blessing of joy God has given me but I haven’t been seeing it as that. So, that’s my lesson in this trial and unknown. Stop taking for granted what’s right in front of me!

Which leads me to another, shorter trial and unknown I recently just walked through. So about 10-11 days ago I had my first dermatologist appointment. For those of you who don’t know me, I’m fair skinned, covered in freckles, and have moles here and there. Well one of those moles decided to change! Its boarder had changed. RED FLAG! So what I knew was always coming, because of my skin type, had finally arrived. I went in and had an overall examine done. Not bad at all and kinda neat if you ask me. Dermatologist can tell so much just by one look, it’s crazy! But she didn’t like the look of the one that had changed and THANKFULLY it was the only one that she questioned. So it was sent for a biopsy. After some conversation with the doctor I feared the worst. (I’m genetically programmed that way when it comes to health things lol) I felt in my heart I was ok but satan still used it against me. He definitely distracted me with it a good bit, placed fears of the unknown and what may be to come in my thoughts, and honestly made me want to do nothing else but think about it at times. However, God was working harder. I did my best to lean on Him. Prayed I don’t know how many times, “Father, I’m picking this worry back up again. Remind me You are in control.”. He also taught me a couple of things, similar to the house situation. Stop taking my husband and my kids for granted! Y’all!!! I love my husband! I love Delmar more than I could ever put into words! He’s my best friend, he always listens to my nonsense, knows how to make me laugh, is so patient with me, helps me when I need it, I could go on and on. Of course we argue and aren’t always on the same page but we never give up on each other. And my kids?! I mean have you met them?! Well, actually some of you may have not. Lyla has the kindest heart I have ever seen in a child! She wears it on her sleeve to just like her Mama. She loves for everyone and boy she loves animals. She’s such a HUGE help around here that I don’t know what I would do without her, her help and her encouragement! She knows when her mommy is down and she’s always there to cheer me on. Melvin, our wild one! I laugh just thinking of all the messes and the “trouble” he gets into. 100% boy! He definitely keeps me on my toes but he sure does love! He may be our one that never stops moving but when he does, he’s a snuggler through and through! He can melt your heart with his, “I love you” because you know he means it. Adaline. I laugh at her too because she makes a million faces in one second. She’s very expressive and she let’s you know what she’s thinking! She’s so determined and she knows what she wants. Which can be tough at times but she can steal anyone’s heart with her big blue eyes no matter what face she makes! That girl! Oh, excuse me, princess, 100% girly girl!! And Titus! Our youngest (currently). He is the calmest, happiest baby I have EVER seen! He is definitely a go with the flow, relaxed kiddo. Smiling ALL the time. You say his name and those two bottom teeth just shine from smiling! It’s crazy how he brings joy and a sense of peace to those he’s around. Anywho, back to this trial and unknown! I got a call from my dermatologist yesterday. Apparently, the mole was just…irritated. Like really? I mean HANDS DOWN I’ll take it but I never knew a mole could get irritated. *palm to forehead* Spent a week and a half thinking the worst and it was just irritated. But, praise the Lord!! I may have cried on the nurse who called me!

In these seasons of the unknown I’m so thankful for the lessons that God has taught me and brought my attention to! I want to soak them up every second I can. Which can take some effort. We live in a world that has distractions left and right. (Maybe another post on this too?) We multitask without even realizing we’re doing it. Our list of to-dos can be unending and let’s be honest, do we ever not have something on a to-do list? So this is something I really, really, REALLY want to work on! God has blessed me with so much and I don’t want to miss out on them because I’m too distracted by other things that in the long run can wait or don’t matter. So, if you see me and think I’m being distracted from what’s important, please let me know! Sometimes, we get so caught up we don’t even realize it.

What trails or unknowns are you walking through right now? We’re not meant to do these things alone so please, make sure you have brothers and sisters walking with you! I’ll be happy to come along side you in prayer and any other way that I can! God Bless!!!